Epiphany
by TheSQExperience
Summary: "We are freshly into the New Year and I was beyond fine with celebrating with my loved ones, meaning the patients that I care for and give new hope for a better life." Erica/Callie


Hello again! I am unsure where anyone who reads this is from, but I am from a wonderful island in the Caribbean that celebrates Christmas until the 22nd of January. In light of this wonderful tradition that we have, I decided to write something a bit close to my heart about the holidays. So here it is...another one shot. Enjoy it and don't be afraid to leave a review or PM me. I am always open to new ideas!

Disclaimer: I sadly do not own them otherwise Erica Hahn would still be on the show.

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><p>We are freshly into the New Year and I was beyond fine with celebrating with my loved ones, meaning the patients that I care for and give new hope for a better life. Some say it's a burden not being able to be with family, but I haven't seen my family since I graduated medical school. There is no regret, no desire to see them; I have merely resigned myself to a life of solidarity.<p>

Or I had. Until I transferred to Seattle Grace and met the one person who has made me rethink what it means to believe in the holiday spirit. I'm not like my counterpart. I have no idea what it means to be apart of a true family. She calls her parents at least twice a week, there are monthly visits, constant gifts in the mail, and most importantly there is an overwhelming sense of love that would make anyone envious. These last three weeks I have learned so much about what it means to be apart of such a glorious family, and I wouldn't change it at all. Okay maybe I would. There is only so much partying one can take before one gets too tired to even function. Back to back surgeries I can handle. 48-hour shifts I can tolerate no problem, but the need to be constantly interacting with people other than Callie and dare I say it Sloan is tiring beyond all words. I'm sitting around the table glancing at all these individuals who have decided to celebrate Dia de los Reyes, or the Epiphany. It's a Spanish holiday, which signifies the end of the 12 days of Christmas; meaning that there is food, music, presents, and people in my house with no end to the future. I let out a deep sigh as I hear the backdoor closing behind me and a blanket wrap around my shoulders.

"Are you okay? You have been out here for awhile?" hands rub up and down my arms in an attempt to stimulate heat production.

I grab one hand, bring Callie in front of me, and encompass her in the blanket as well. Wrapping my arms around her waist, I snuggle into her back and let out a sigh of relief. This is what I was missing, this sense of peace. "I am fine Callie. I have never been around this many people on a constant basis. It's a shock to my delicate sensibilities."

She giggles and turns to face me. "Delicate sensibilities? Erica, you could single handedly scare everyone out of your house in less than 10 minutes." I smirk at her very accurate assessment, for let's face it I am quite impressive when I need to be. Callie's hands come around my neck. "You know my dad would like you to say something before dinner. Not a prayer, but something profound nonetheless."

I close my eyes and lean my forehead against hers. "You did tell him that I don't like people? And the only family I really have are you, Sloan, and Yang when she isn't being annoying? I have nothing that I could possi…" Soft lips meet mine. I tighten my grip around Callie's waist and respond with a greater passion than was necessary, hoping to relay both my fear and acceptance for what I know will happen anyways. I pull back when I hear a moan and chuckle to myself. "Your distraction technique needs a bit of work." I trail kisses down the side of her neck, then back up to her ear lobe before nipping at the spot behind her ear. Another moan is my prize. Satisfied with my work, I let go of her. "Well I suppose there is no time like the present?"

"Erica?"

"Yes Cal?"

"We will be finishing what you started, right?"

I pull her against me again for a quick kiss. "Of course love. Right after we celebrate this holiday with your family. Any idea what I should say?" She puts her head on my shoulder and I hear her mumbling softly. I rub her back and let out a small chuckle. "I need to be able to hear you if you want to help me."

Callie lifts her head and has a smile on her face. "I said my dad loves honesty. He likes something from the heart. Something that he can look back and say that ideal or thought is what I based the rest of my year on." Placing her hands on my chest she leans forward to look me in the eye. "Just be yourself Erica. You have a way of making everyone listen to you." She kisses my cheek and escapes back into the warmth of the house.

I let out a sigh and stick my hands in my pockets. "Something from the heart? I should be able to do that. I am a heart surgeon…" I kick at the invisible rocks by my feet; a habit garnered from years of trying to be invisible myself. "Yeah being a heart surgeon doesn't help me right now. I'm going to have to wing it." With one last look at the winter wonderland, I remove the blanket from around my shoulders and walk back into the house.

My house has become a maelstrom since my need for fresh air got the best of me. There are people everywhere. Conversations at every turn. Smells of delicious food, music, dancing, and laughter have all made themselves comfortable in my home. The only thing I can do is smile. While my family has been absent, these wonderful people have accepted me into their traditions and have become my family. I have learned so much from them, and the New Year is about accepting changes to become a better person; I do believe I need to thank them for helping me on that journey. Callie's father whistle echoes throughout the house, the signal that every one is to quite down and make their way to the dining area.

I get to the dining room and stand next to Callie, wrapping my arm around her waist as both an anchor and a comfort for the inevitable speech I have to make.

Carlos cleared his throat to get the attention of the room. "Familia. Tonight we are here to celebrate the holidays, as our illustrious hostesses were much too busy saving lives to celebrate on time with us. So tonight we are having our festivities. Now I have asked Calliope to say something, but she informed me earlier tonight that she delegated that duty to Erica." I look over at Callie with a raised eyebrow. She had the sense to give a sheepish shrug. "So Erica, whenever you are ready the floor is yours." He steps back and I feel all the eyes shift to me.

I squeeze Callie's waist quickly before releasing her and stepping forward. "First, I want to thank everyone for coming out tonight. A few of us here are doctors and it is rare to have a full night off, let alone a night that was requested weeks in advance. Something is always coming up and preventing us from living a normal life. For those who aren't doctors and were able to make it with no problem, still thank you. You have no idea what it means that you are here celebrating the holidays at an abnormal time. So I thank you for your patience and your willingness to be nontraditional.

When it comes to the holidays, we all overlook what it means. Our focus has shifted from family to the more material meaning of Christmas. We have forgotten that before gifts, there was love and family. We are all guilty of that, and no one is guiltier than I. For years, I haven't really had a family and therefore didn't celebrate the holidays. They became a time of the year when all those cheerful sentiments I found to be empty. What is the point of wishing someone joy and good tidings if I myself had no intention of those things for myself? It was lonely, unfulfilling, and downright exhausting. Being that person that no one wanted to be around was bad enough, but it got infinitely worse around that holidays. Recently however, that has changed. I, myself, haven't really changed but my circumstances have. In the last year, I've gained love, a sense of belonging, but most importantly I've regained what the holidays are truly about.

I have gained perspective and realized that I have received the best gift of all, the gift of family. So you see, this holiday season has been about both gifts and family. This Christmas, I have been blessed with the concept of duality. Gifts and family; one cannot occur without the other. And while 90% of the world is more concerned with gifts being a brought by family, I can happily say that this year I became one of those left over individuals who have realized that Christmas isn't about gifts, money, or anything else that can be bought. It's about the people who you welcome into your home and give you a sense of peace, home, family, love, and belonging. These are the true gifts of Christmas, and something that I am glad to share with everyone. " I slip my hands into my pockets and step back next to Callie. She squeezes the arm closest to her while Carlos tells everyone to go ahead and begin eating.

Carlos approaches us after the room is mostly cleared. "That was a wonderful speech Erica. I am very happy that you feel comfortable and a part of our family. It has been a blessing for us having you in Calliope's life. She has been much happier now than I have seen her be since she was a little girl. I am honored to have you in my family." He puts his hand on my shoulder and gives an affectionate squeeze before leaving Callie and I alone.

I smirk in her direction. "Your father wanted me to say something, huh?" I chuckle as she blushes and ducks her head. I place two fingers under her chin to have her look at me. "Why did you want me to say something and not do it yourself?"

"To me the holidays have always been about gifts. When you grow up in the family I did, there was never a bare Christmas. Gifts were plentiful and family was not. When I talked to Yang a few days ago, she told me how she felt about Christmas. How the only real reason she enjoys it, is because of Meredith. That is her family. Yang and Grey; the two most cynical individuals in our hospital. She also said that you mentioned how much dislike you had for the holidays during your surgery. So when my dad asked me to say something, I felt as though you needed to say something. You needed the time to draw your own conclusions and see that you are the one person in my life that is my family. Yes I still have parents and a sister, but I choose you. And I will choose you every single day of my life. I just wanted you to realize that as well, which you kinda did." She tilts her head to the side as she waits for my response. I smile and hug her tight to me.

"I love you. I hope you know that." I pull back and kiss her chastely. "Thank you for being my family Callie." She smiles and begins to walk away. I take a second to think before grabbing her wrist and pulling her back to me.

"What is it? I've been waiting all day for this food so whatever it is…." She stops talking when I kneel down in front of her.

I kiss her hand then look up at her. "I've be alone for most of my adult life. I've experienced so many different things since you have come into my life, and I want to keep experiencing new things with you for the rest of my life." I pull the small box that I have been carrying around out of my pocket. "I have had this ring for months now waiting for the right moment. And I know this isn't romantic. There is no fancy dinner. No big show of emotion. But we are better than that. Everything about our relationship has been natural, not forced. So now I am kneeling in front of you asking you to look forward in your life and picture me there, because I want to be the person you fall asleep with and the one you wake up to. I want to build a better family with you. I want to look back on my year on New Years Day for the rest of my life and relive every amazing moment that we have had together during that year. I know that being with someone is hard and I know that marriage is harder, but I want you despite the difficulties. I want you forever Calliope Iphegenia Torres…" I open the box. She has tears streaming down her face and I look around her to see an audience has gathered in the doorway. I refocus my attention on the single most beautiful thing in my life and smile at her.

"Marry me?"

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><p>AN: ooooh...cliffhanger! I'm sorry to have left it like that...actually no I am not. It gives me a purpose to continue writing. Also I do apologize for the long monologues...I write speeches to help pay for my education, so that seems to make an appearance in my writing. I am trying to stop, but muscle memory is a pain in the ass and sometimes my mind gets the best of me. Anywho please review or PM me with ideas! I want to hear from people.<p>

Adios,  
>Sage<p> 


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